I am thankful for so many things!
The Lord has been so good to us!
I am thankful for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and for the 41 years as a member where I learned so much!
I am thankful for the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon, and including the Lectures on Faith.
I am thankful most of all for the atonement of Jesus Christ, and for knowing that repentance means turning back to God, and that God is love.
I am thankful for my family, for all my Moms and Dads, most of whom are on the other side of the veil, but who I still feel with me sometimes.
I am thankful for my wonderful children and grandchildren. I am thankful for my beautiful sisters and brothers. I am thankful my siblings wanted me to be with them today, even though I wasn’t able to make the trip.
I am thankful for my friends, and especially grateful right now for my “weird” friends who accept my own weirdness, and are willing to teach me more about all the cool things they know.
I am thankful to know I am nothing, and yet that I am a child of God. I am thankful for the paradoxes, which have taught me a lot of truth.
I am so grateful to the Lord for teaching me how to better hear Him. I am so grateful for Him waking me up! I pray I can arise now. I am so thankful for the Baptism of Fire and the great blessings that have come from that.
Some people think that what we believe now, or what we express about problems we see, is all negative. To me even the problems we see are not really negative in that way, in my mind. And the problems are only a small part of all this, but seeing them is what had to happen for me to wake up, and shatter my false paradigm which was causing me to make the Church and leaders idols, and causing me to rely on the arm of flesh, even though I thought I wasn’t. The Lord had to show me the truth (which is what I prayed for) in order for me to progress. To me truth=light=love.
In our first post I wrote that we took the red pill. We wanted truth. Truth is not always pretty, but to me it is always good. I have learned that the only way to actually get the real truth is from the Lord. There is so much out there on the internet, so many voices, so much “research,” so many experiences. Ultimate truth is not discerned only by reading and study. Even using the scriptures, you can “prove” opposing points of view. Which is right? So reading and study is important and necessary, but after that is done it requires pondering and prayer and the Lord telling you where the truth is.
But if you are afraid to read and study, if the possibilities make you angry, and you won’t even ponder and ask, then the Lord will give you what you want. He never forces, he only persuades. He gives you what you want.
I want truth, light, and love. I am so thankful for all of that I have been able to receive, and I pray that I will be prepared and able and unafraid to receive more. I am so thankful that the Lord began to teach me years ago in a profound way (when a guy broke into our house) that perfect love casteth out all fear.
So, none of what we know that might seem negative to some of you reading our blog is negative to me, at least I am not sad that I know it. I am sad about some of it, because what we have lost, what we would not receive, and the ways we persecute and judge each other are sad. But knowing the truth is not sad, it is good, even when it is hard.
And the “negative” is not all I see as far as the Church is concerned by any means! I had 41 years of association with such beautiful, glorious people who were honest and pure in heart and wanting only to do the Lord’s will. And I hope those wonderful people will continue to associate with us :). (We really are still the same, you know.) And we would not have ever known the things I know now, or had the amazing experiences we have had, without the foundation the Church gave us. I am forever grateful that the Lord told me to join the LDS Church when I was 15!
So, I am thankful for everything I know! And I pray I will learn and understand more and more, and that my preconceived false notions will all be removed! And that everything I have wrong will be fixed.
So, anyone who has read this, I thank you for getting through my ramblings :).
Happy Thanksgiving to all! And my dear family and friends, know that I love you. Don’t be afraid to talk to us, even if you think we are now apostates, or weird, or whatever. But please read at least our first blog post, if you haven’t, before you decide what to think about what we believe, before you judge us. It is hard to be misunderstood, and that first post gives at least a snippet of what we have experienced.
I pray the Lord’s greatest blessings will be on you all!